Spelunking.

You’ve never been one to make the reach. Exerting effort was never something you liked. You’d rather not have to try. 

You don’t want to fight for what you want. Let it come to you. Don’t try,  just hope that She finds you.  Whomever “She” is. 

I hope you find someone that you want so badly you climb out of the dark. I hope you find a reason to use your unused heart. 

I learned long ago that I don’t like the dark. I hate caverns where I can’t feel the stars. You are a cavern. 

You don’t want to be alone in the echoes. You are terrified of all the things you don’t know. Like being alone. Having to stay or go. Finding your own home. 

One day I hope you make the reach. I used to wish that it was me. Part of me still wants you to make the leap. Reach for me.

But I don’t go climbing into caves, anymore. I know myself enough to know I’ll get lost. I know I fit too well inside caverns without doors and it scares me that it’s so easy to not want more. 

I won’t go inside the caverns and I won’t pretend I like your cave. I wish you’d climb out, reach, you can be the one to do the save. 

Save yourself. 

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